Learning to love.

“It is impossible to fall out of love. Love is such a powerful emotion, that once it envelops you it does not depart. True love is eternal. If you think that you were once in love, but fell out of it, then it wasn't love you were in. There are no 'exit' signs in love, there is only an 'on' ramp.”

They say people do crazy things in love. They say love can overcome all obstacles. That love is endless and never ceasing. They say when you find the one you love, you know, you may not be able to explain why, you just know. Love is fighting over who does the dishes. Love is calling each other out on your mistakes. Love is always ending the day with a smile on your face, hoping they have a smile for the same reasons. It's

staying in bed an extra hour after you've woken up, just to keep snuggling. Love is playing paper rock scissors to decide who has to get up to turn the light off. Love is still getting butterflies everytime he walks into the room. Love is finishing each others sentences. It's getting lost in each others eyes at just one glance. It's when you jump up & stop everything u are doing to answer his phone call Love is smiling ear to ear when you see his name come up anywhere. Love is having every kiss, feel as special as the very first. It's still learning about each other, even after a lifetime together. Love is feeling like part of you has been ripped away, whenever you're apart. Love is tossing and turning all night when they're not there. It's when you see each other after forever and still thinking, "wow, how did I get so lucky". Love is always knowing things will work out the way they're supposed to, and trying not losing sight of that. It's knowing that no matter what, there is a plan for all of us. That there is no such thing as a coincidence, that everything does happen for a specific reason. For us to grow, to become stronger, to appreciate, to realize, to be a shoulder to cry on, to be a hand to hold, to be a light at the end of someone elses tunnel.

I believe that love is endless. You may think you know what it's like, but for everyone it's different. No two people, will ever be able to fall in love the same way. No one, will ever have your stories, or lives together. No one will be able to compare, to what you feel is perfection.

Truth be told, we all get to the point where we feel like throwing in the towel, asking ourselves, "can I keep doing this?". Some, more than others. The point where you have no more tears to cry. No more energy to run. When we look up to the sky and shout, "you win world, you win". When it seems that there is no silver lining, and that the grass isn't always greener. When you've almost lost all hope and faith. Or when forever seems so far away. I've been there a lot lately, and it's not something I'd wish on any relationship.

Not knowing...it's the worst thing in the world. Not knowing when you'll see each other. Not knowing what's gonna happen. If things are going to work out. Not knowing whether today's the day things will turn up daisies, and things are going to change. If this is still, all apart of our little plan in life. Personally, I've made a lot of mistakes in my own life, and own relationship. With my family, with my friends, and recently, I've made a lot in regards to my love relationship. Nothing I ever do can repair those cracks, instead we're forced to "learn from things" and such. We learn a lot throughout relationships with others, whether romantic of platonic. Then, in a sense I guess, love is learning. Learning to adjust. Learning to grow. Learning to make compromises. Learning to relate to each other. Learning your flaws. Learning to put them, before yourself.

Love is about learning. Learning to love.

I know that doesn't really make much sense, but it is true I feel. Right out of the womb, we're not aware of what it means to love. We're not born to be our own personal Dr.Phil's. We don't know what's right or wrong in a relationship that's meant for YOU. For most, it seems so easy to give out life changing advice to those we care about, but when we're placed in the same positions, we get stuck, and are lost as to what we need to do, or what may be best for us. Throughout our lives, we grow and learn about anything and everything, each day. So why wouldn't we have to learn, to love, and to be loved. To grow to be accustomed to that type of life. Not everything in life is easy, let's face it...1/100 things go as planned in life. It's impossible to have a schedule for things in yours. Some of the best things happen, on a whim, without a plan.

I love the man in my life. I love, Austin James Brown, with every fiber of my being and would go to the ends of the earth for him to be happy. For me, love is having him on my mind, from sun up, to sun down. It's having his clothes pop up randomly as subtle reminders. Love is wishing every day could have a fast forward button while we're apart, and wanting to stop time when we're together. It's wishing everything in life would just stop, because missing him gets so hard some days.

Now, some people might read this, and think, "silly puppy love teenagers". That's their choice. It's their choice to believe whether or not another couples feelings for each other are strong enough to last. If I've realized anything the past few days. It's that other people, don't matter when it comes to your happiness. You have to, and always will need to, do what makes you happy. Whatever that may be, and it shouldn't be the concern of others. The ones who matter will always stay in your life.

I'll end this with some words of advice, for both men and women.

Men: You may think that the whole excuse, "get used to it, I'm a girl" is overrated and untrue, but you're most likely wrong. Women are simply wired that way, a completely different way that you guys are. Yes, we're irrational at times. Yes, we can be very emotionally unstable. Yes we overanalyze, and twist the things you say. But this is the honest to God truth (well, for most of us). We can't help it. It's true, girls feed off drama, I'm no stranger to that. It adds excitement, but sometimes, not in the best ways, and we don't realize that til later. We don't mean to drive you crazy, swear it. We just have a different set of controls up there than you do. Cut us some slack though sometimes, you might not realize all that a woman really does for you.

Women: Now I know, I should say that we're all saints and we're always right, but we're not. Just like men will never be able to understand a woman, unless he was or will be one, women will never understand men in the same way. We're both wired completely different. Men work on a different schedule, while we play mind games, they are straight forward, and will say what's on their mind. They won't beat around the bush, and don't really have any, guards up against speaking up. We've ALL pulled the "no it's okay, you can go out with your buddies" trick one time or another, and if you haven't, be prepared. Guys aren't going to pick up on our tricks and scheming. They're going to take you seriously, and going to go out. We shouldn't get mad because with how their brains work, they take everything as the truth and honesty. They're not as quick to recognize how girls plot. So we need to cut them some slack too, with a lot of stuff. When he says you look good, BELIEVE him. Don't fight and argue, he won't tell you something unless he means it.

I could go on and on, but this is already incredibly long. So this is it for now.